


Wine

by DeckofDragons



Category: A Hat in Time (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Drunken Singing, Drunkenness, Gen, Humor, Snatcher hates the movie Frozen for obvious reasons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-08
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2021-02-19 20:13:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22171075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeckofDragons/pseuds/DeckofDragons
Summary: Snatcher gets his hands on a crate of fancy wine.
Relationships: Hat Kid & Snatcher (A Hat in Time)
Comments: 16
Kudos: 155





	Wine

**Author's Note:**

> In one of the Discord servers I'm in, people were discussing what Snatcher would be like drunk. I was mostly lurking during the whole conversation because I was busy doing proper adult things at the laundromat and hating it. But I did say they were making me kinda wanna write a thing, they told me I should so here we are with this fic.

Snatcher stared at the bottle of fancy wine in his hand, stolen from a Mafia goon who’d wondered into his forest, trying to smuggle a whole crate of expensive wine to who even knew where. It didn’t matter either, the goon had paid the ultimate price for his folly and now all the wine belonged to Snatcher.

If he drank it would it affect him? The EX potions had but those were made with magic while this wasn’t so… maybe not. Having never tried it despite how long he’d been a ghost – he’d never really thought to and rarely had the opportunity even come about – he had no way of knowing. Did he _want_ to try it though? Even before his death, it had been a very long time since he’d had alcohol. Vanessa hadn’t allowed it for fear that it might lead to him ‘being unfaithful’ due to poor impulse control. … That meant he _had_ to drink it because anything she didn’t want him to do was something he _wanted_ to do now that he could.

With an evil grin, Snatcher grasped the cork with his other hand and pulled it out with a satisfying pop. He raised it to his mouth and downed half the bottle in a matter of seconds. Just like everything he consumed that wasn’t a living soul it barely had a taste. It was like tasting the ghost of wine long dead, making it a rather unsatisfying experience. He finished the bottle anyway; at his size even if it did affect him it probably wouldn’t give him much more than a strong buzz. … Unless his alcohol tolerance was the same as when he’d been alive, probably not though. Meaning he should probably be able to drink as much as he pleased with little worry.

***

Hat Kid landed in the forest in front of the giant tree that housed one of Snatcher’s reading spots. A good spot to land because he was often there and uh… he was there too this time somewhere. She didn’t see him right away but she sure did hear him.

“ _Let it go, let it gooooo. Can’t hold it back anymoooore_.” He was singing loudly. Which was odd to say the least but made it easy to find him, she just had to follow his singing off the path and to the left. And there he was, his upper half draped over a low hanging tree limb, his tail lying limply on the ground. He was belting his heart out and holding a bottle that looked suspiciously like a bottle of wine which explained some things. Though who would’ve thought ghosts could get drunk.

“ _Let it go, let it goooo_ ,” he sung what was presumably the chorus again. His singing voice was surprisingly quite nice. “ _Turn away and slam the dooooor. I don’t care what they’re going to_ …” He cut off as he finally seemed to spot her. “Hey kid,” he said with a slight hiccup. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to say ‘hi’,” she replied with a smile. “What song are you singing? I like it.”

“Well you _shouldn’t_.” His expression grew angry as he took a drink from the bottle. “It’s an _awful_ song, I hate it so much. That whole _movie_ is awful kid, you wouldn’t even believe how bad it is. They’re making a sequel too! I hope that awful ice bitch dies in it, I hate her so pecking much, she’s the worst.” He took another drink. “I guess Anna isn’t that bad though. … But Olaf needs to die in a pecking fire. The only actual good character in the whole stupid movie is the damn moose and _that’s_ because he doesn’t say anything.”

This was a movie Hat Kid was going to have to find sometime later. “If you hate the song and the movie it came from so much why are you singing it?”

“Because I can’t get it out of my damn _head_. When that _stupid_ movie first came out everyone was singing it all the time everywhere and it was the _worst._ They wouldn’t stop kid, they just kept doing it. They kept wondering into _my_ forest, singing or humming that damn song. There was _no_ escaping it no matter how hard I tried. It was honestly the worst few months of my entire existence as a ghost.” Which didn’t explain why he was singing it now since that the way he spoke of it, that was clearly in the past. “I _hate_ it.”

Maybe it was wrong of Hat Kid to find Snatcher’s state of inebriation so funny but she couldn’t help it. She never would’ve thought she’d see him of all people so very drunk. “Maybe try singing a song you _do_ like to get that one out of your head?”

“Huh? … You might actually have a point for once kid. How come I never thought of that?” Because he was clearly too drunk to think straight. If he remembered this tomorrow, he was going to be very unhappy, though he’d probably try to pretend it never happened. “What song should I sing?”

“Uh I don’t know, how about one from a movie you _do_ like.”

“Hmmm…” As he thought he took another drink and vanished the bottle before summoning another. Hat Kid should _maybe_ try to cut him off or at least tell him he’d had enough but he was a ghost. He couldn’t die of alcohol poisoning or throw up – she didn’t think so at least – and he didn’t have a body he had to worry about damaging so he’d be fine. So if he wanted to drink another bottle _after_ this one she’d tell him to stop, insist on it, but for now she wanted to enjoy this, get to know him a bit better… and get more fodder to tease him with later.

“Oh, I know a good one,” he said finally, perking up. “ _Let’s get down to business, to defeat the Huns_ …”


End file.
